Tone Parsons

I know that summer is on the decline, but I decided that today I would share my OMG SUPPAH SECRET recipe for hamburgers ala Tone.

These tasty little morsels are guaranteed* to please everyone who enjoys a bit of dead cow now and again!

This recipe serves 5, but you could easily make  it serve 6 or 1, depending on how big you make the friggin’ patties.  It’s up to you!

First, round up the ingredients!

• ~1.25 pounds of 80% lean ground beef
• About 1/4 cup of finely chopped red onion
• 2 slices of soft bread (white will do just fine)
• 1 egg
• 1/4 cup of milk
• 1/4 tsp of garlic powder
• 1 tbsp of Montreal seasoning
• 1 tbsp of Worcester sauce

Put it all in a large mixing bowl and mash it with your hands, making sure to get it between your fingers, until you can’ t see the bread any more.

Of course, before you do that, you’ll probably want to get some waxed paper out (while your hands are still clean!!). I grab two sheets that are the width of my cutting board (about 2 1/2 feet). Place one on the cutting board, then make 5 balls of the meat mixture and place on the waxed paper. Go wash the crap offa your hands, then place the second sheet of waxed paper on the top of the 5 balls.

Slowly press down on the top sheet of waxed paper to create 5 patties. Once they’re about 5 inches around (or around 1/2 inch thick), you’re ready to cut the paper into 5 separate sections (using a knife). This is handy because you can now put the patties on a plate to carry out to your grill without them sticking to each other.

I usually let my patties sit for about 20 – 30 minutes before putting them on the grill, to let the flavors combine.

Grill until they’re done the way you like ’em. Slap on some cheese if desired (I like pepper-jack or chipotle cheddar, as they add some more “zing!” to the taste) and let it melt.

Now, take ’em into the house, slap ’em on a bun, and enjoy!!

* guarantee not valid in any country where the name of thus said country contains either a consonant or vowel.