Tone Parsons

I’m still here

Sorry about the delay between posts.

I’ve been in a funk for quite a while now, and posts will probably be few and far between until I can find my happy place again.

I did see my neurologist a few weeks ago.  There’s no change with the neuropathy.  After sticking me with needles and holding a tuning fork against both of my feet, he declared that it’s gone static… which is what they expect to see.  He also said that my symptoms were classic for what I have going on down there (feet hurt like they’ve been beaten with a stick, feeling like they’re asleep, and no tactile sensation).  He doesn’t expect it to get any worse or better.

Hurray for me!

I also saw my physician last week.  Oh… what a good time that was!  For a man who can sit and listen, he doesn’t seem to hear much…. nor does he seem to remember anything.

Every time I see him, I have to recite my entire case history.  He always asks if I’m still working (“um… no… you put me on disability and haven’t released me yet”).   This last visit made me want to grab him by the neck and slap the crap out of him.   It’s time to find a new doctor… I’ve had it.

I’m sick of just being prescribed medicine to dull the pain (which the current dosage does not do) and want something… ANYTHING… that will make it so I can leave the house without making it so that I’m flat on my back for the next 2 days.  I want desperately to go back to work, earn my share, and get off of this crap disability.

Unlike a lot of people out there, I hate being on disability.  It’s a lot like being on welfare (at least to me).  It’s that damn mid-west work ethic that was instilled in me I guess.  Sitting around on your ass with your hand out is unacceptable to me.  I need to pull my own weight.

It would also be nice to have a social life again.  Since I’ve gone out on disability (a year and 4 months ago), only one friend has come to see me… and I’ve only seen them twice.  I only get phone calls from “friends” when they need something (ie. they broke their computer).  I guess I need new friends too.

Sorry about the downer post, but I’m in a rather dark place at the moment.  Hopefully I’ll have something a little more bright to post next time.


2 Comments so far

  1. Mike February 21st, 2009 9:42 am

    Hi – I am so sorry to hear about things as they are.

    FWIW, we are going to be in town today (21 Feb) for tax time. I can’t seem to find your # at the moment, but if you see this msg, drop me a line with your number.

    Hang in there!


  2. Deb February 22nd, 2009 2:56 pm

    Hang in there, I can’t tell you that things will get better because of course I don’t know that. But keep your chin up, You have a wonderful family that loves you, both close family and distant. I’m just a phone call or text away. ok email too.